Tuesday, January 9, 2525

Introduction/Rating System


TAKE 1: One Mans Opinion
by Frederick William Springer III
 

I’ve been trying to figure out my shtick in this niche.  And I’ve decided to steer clear of the “movie critique” and “movie review,” the former sounding like something pompous from a self-proclaimed know-it-all and the latter laying out the whole plot of the movie making it so you really need not see the film at all.  In fact, some critiques and reviews are normally well over a page long when many readers just want to know if they should invest their time and money to go see the flick.  Is it good or not?

That’s where I step in.  First of all, I’m offering my opinion.  Everyone’s taste is different and even one person’s tastes develop and change overtime.  I have watched a lot of movies in my life and have taken a film course or 2, but I don’t claim to be any kind of expert in the matter.  I believe that film is largely subjective—you love one movie, I hate it, another film is among my favorites, you think it’s shit.

From my own experience with this project, I’ve found that I actually like it better when I don’t see the trailer (or read a review) beforehand, this way I limit my expectations (misguided or otherwise) going in.  This translates into me, more often than not, forgoing a summary of the movie I’m opinionating about unless it’s crucial to me making an argument for or against seeing it (more often than not, the more lengthy reviews are those in which I found fault with a movie I didn’t care for, or points that nagged me in one that I otherwise did).

As far as rating goes, I’m still working on my gimmick.  Thumbs are trademarked (and really are too cut and dry) and stars are overdone.  Whatever the end result (clapboards to keep with the Take 1 theme, perhaps?), the point system will work out this way:
6- Great movie.  I’d want it a part of my personal collection (in whatever format is current).
5- Good.
4- Eh, maybe you’d want to check it out.
3- Eh, maybe you won’t.
2- Bad.  Don’t waste your time.
1- Terrible.  If someone holds a gun to your head and tells you to watch this movie or else, tell them to go ahead and pull the trigger, you’ll die a happier person.

But again, that’s just one man’s opinion.  I know one movie I despised, many heralded as the greatest thing since sliced bread, so, in the end, again, it’s all subjective.  You may find that your own opinion lines up with mine often, occasionally or seldom.  And, based on that, you’ll decide whether or not you want to consult my write-ups before choosing what to see, or to review them afterwards to see if we were in agreement, or maybe not at all.  The choice is yours as I’m not holding a gun.

Directory

TAKE 1: One Mans Opinion


…because film is largely subjective
                                          
by Frederick William Springer III

Just off my 45th review, I feel the blog has become too cumbersome for any would-be readers to find what they’re actually looking for so I’ve taken the time to make this rudimentary DIRECTORY that I will keep as a living document, updating it with any future reviews.  The trade-off is that Blogger won’t let me format in columns, so it is a never-ending eye sore.  You win some, you lose some!

*For some unknown, glitch of a reason, though it tests completely fine before I publish, Blogger keeps removing the "h" in "http" for both Hotel Transylvania and Taken 2, invalidating the links.  If you just add that "h" in your browser, you'll get connected.

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Monday, January 1, 2018

Star Wars: The Last Jedi

TAKE 1: One Mans Opinion
…because film is largely subjective

 by Frederick William Springer III
 
Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Release Date:  15 December 2017                                                       Runtime:  152 Minutes              
Review Date:  1 January 2018                                                              Rating:  4 (of 6)
 

     Another mediocre outing.

     Our bad guy Kylo Ren is still weak and poorly fleshed out.

     And most of the movie felt like needless exposition.

     *Allow me to preface the rest by noting that vague and specific SPOILERS abound henceforth.

     Like the last film was a (poor) remake of the original, from the start this seems like a (poor) remake of The Empire Strikes Back.  Empire begins with Imperial Forces discovering the Rebels' hideout and going in to destroy it.  The Last Jedi, likewise, has the Imperialist replacements having located the last of the rebels and going in for the kill.

     Supreme Leader Snoke--by the way, what is the purpose of having him be computer animated when there is nothing about his design that prohibits practical makeup for a more realistic portrayal?--is supposed to be the ultimate baddie.  But he fizzles too quickly (and easily) (ditto Captain Phasma), and we're still left not knowing who he was or where he came from.

     The major cameo was cool but leads to a major plot problem--Obi Wan was the first we saw returning from the dead to mentor Luke.  By the end of Return of the Jedi, we saw that Yoda and Anakin had this ability too.  So when Kylo Ren went down the twisted path he chose and started worshipping at the altar of Darth Vader, why didn't the ghostly form of Anakin appear (repeatedly as necessary) to set his grandson straight?  If they're saving this for the final installment, it's a little late, both on the storytellers' part and the part of Anakin.

     In addition to the cameo (cheesy as it may have been), Luke's battle against Kylo Ren was probably the highlight of the film.  But only because I used the same tactic in an unrelated screenplay I wrote myself over 7 years ago.

     I foresaw the lame Obi Wan ending coming for Luke but was still surprised (and disappointed) when they actually went through with it and how it was executed.  Harrison Ford at least looked like he was having fun during his return (as poor as the role was), while Mark Hamill was just brooding what screen time he had.

     And with Carrie Fisher's untimely death, it makes for all our heroes now out of the picture.  Also untimely.

     Maybe with Princess Leia out, you can carry on with your cameos and have Lando take her place.  Just because, fuck it, that would be fun.

     Nitpicking, after making a big (unexplained) deal about C3PO's arm being red in the last film, it's back to normal now without so much as a word.  [You were forced to read a one-off comic to find out the history of the red arm.  And once you had, as cliché as it was, the sentiment behind it seemed like it would have been a permanent replacement--it was a robot friend's arm that died saving him--instead of disappearing as fast as you bat an eye.]

     Then there was the ridiculously bonehead occurrence of Rose Tico stopping Finn's sacrificial suicide run, moments away from him surely succeeding.  He was going to SAVE EVERYBODY.  Instead, she just about commits suicide herself just to save him alone, only to put him and everyone else back in harm's way moments later; take a page out of the Star Trek playbook here, "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one". 

     Or stick to your own franchise--in A New Hope, the pilots all knew it was a suicide mission going down the trench to try and blow up the Death Star, but they did it for the wellbeing of others and were heroes for it.  Can you imagine some knucklehead pushing Luke's fighter off course moments before he fired at and destroyed the Death Star?  Or, even better analogies from this film, someone stopping Vice Admiral Holdo's final assault or Rose Tico's own sister's attack!  The Rebels would have been in a worse dire straits, shit storm than they already were!  (Ultimately, because of Rose Tico's selfish act, Luke Skywalker is dead.  That's right, connect the dots.  Had Finn been allowed to complete his kamikazi flight, the resulting damage would have held the First Order off rather than Luke having to expend all his energy doing so.)

     There are so many other issues, just rewriting history between The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi --like totally reshooting the final scene of the former or changing Kylo Ren's injuries--that I won't dive in any further. In any case, I'd almost rather sit and watch the prequel trilogy again instead; I had no love for them.  And in comparison to Adam Driver, who thought we'd ever be heralding Hayden Christensen's acting chops?

     I don't know how they selected writer/director Rian Johnson from obscurity or know what hell froze over that Disney has since given their blessing for him to helm a whole new trilogy in the Star Wars Universe.  I'm just glad he won't be involved in the final installment of this one.  (Seriously, it's like he was invited into a prestigious, exclusive sandbox, asked "What's sand?," and then proceeded to dump all the sand out.)  Hopefully, J.J. Abrams can salvage this mess.

     [For any naysayers, I'm not some Star Wars super fan.  Far from it.  What I am a fan of is good writing (characterization, dialogue, continuity and plot all included) and entertainment.  While I didn't enjoy either of these Star Wars installments, I did like Rogue One which was a story that no one (myself included) even wanted.]

Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

TAKE 1: One Mans Opinion
…because film is largely subjective
 by Frederick William Springer III
 
Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice
Release Date:  25 March 2016                                                              Runtime:  151 Minutes              
Review Date:  14 June 2016                                                                   Rating:  2.5 (of 6)

      If you're looking for Man of Steel 2, you won't find it here; Superman has second billing to Batman as Henry Cavill does to Ben Affleck.  Counterintuitively, the superb job that was done developing the very rich, three dimensional character of Clark Kent/Superman (and the groundwork for future sequels and a cinematic universe) was all tossed aside here for a very flat portrayal because Batman is the star and the main focus is on him.

     The problem with that is, in this rendition, Bruce Wayne/Batman is an absolute asshole.  There is nothing likeable--he now takes to sadistically branding people like cattle--or even entertaining about him.  On top of stale flashbacks, we are also quite needlessly immersed in Bruce Wayne's dream/fantasy sequences.  Apparently, nothing was learned from the shoddy audio in The Dark Knight Rises as Batman is given a similar, difficult to understand mechanical voice as Bane possessed in that film.

     This movie had really good potential and could have soared if all the Batman stuff prior to and including his "versus" matchup with Superman was eliminated and we then spent a little more time with, and thereby continued to develop, the Man of Steel crew.  (You know, maybe even explain how Superman, who has now been partaking in good deeds captured on film for the past 18 months, still maintains anonymity, completely unrecognized as Clark Kent...Completely unrecognized working in a room full of journalists...even though there's a larger-than-life statue of him RIGHT OUTSIDE.)

     And how is it that, even though they have yet to introduce themselves to the world, Lex Luthor already has the logos of the other Justice League members?

     [Warning: Minor *Spoilers* Ahead] Even with the reasons the filmmakers try to provide, Bruce Wayne's stance on Superman and his follow-through plan seem completely over-the-top.  He has incredibly unbelievable tunnel vision when it comes to Kal-El, ready to murder him without a second thought, making it quite clear that he's literally out for blood.  And when he finally has him where he wants him, Superman's life hanging in the balance, all it takes is one magic word from Superman--"Martha"--and suddenly this twisted mind just snaps out of it immediately and completely, without a second thought.  Really?  Furthermore, having been fighting crime for 20 years, presumably much of that time battling wits with his nemesis the Joker, are we really to buy that Bruce Wayne was so easily and blindly manipulated by Lex Luthor in the first place?

     As we still have Zack Snyder at the helm, still have David S. Goyer writing (after a successful run on the last Batman trilogy prior to Man of Steel) and The Dark Knight helmer Chris Nolan himself still executive producing, the only feasible explanation seems to be that when Warner Bros. decided they wanted to get into a pissing contest with Marvel and hastily throw together a Justice League to combat the Avengers, they opted to sacrifice good story telling in the process, this film seeming more like never ending action stitched together than coherent, well-rounded, plausible-in-this-universe plot.

Sunday, December 27, 2015

Retirement

TAKE 1: One Mans Opinion
…because film is largely subjective
by Frederick William Springer III
      I'm officially announcing my semi-retirement.  This blog started to serve as a portfolio should a movie critic position open up and I needed to present sample reviews.
     However, 3 1/2 years and 110 reviews later, it has become more like a chore, an unwanted obligation and any fun has been sucked out of it.  You know what would be fun?  Getting paid.

     I was initially going to hang my hat on the 100th current review (Tomorrowland) mid-July
but with the latest Bond, final Hunger Games and the start of a new Star Wars trilogy all on the immediate horizon, films I thought I might have something to say about, I figured I'd hold on rather than quickly jump out of retirement as soon as I had entered it.

     Now, moving forward, I'll only take to the keyboard if I feel extremely passionate about a film, one way or the other.  Or the movie starts with a "Q", "U", "Y" or "Z", just to fill the alphabet void.

     (June 5, 2012-Dec 23, 2015)

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Star Wars: The Force Awakens in IMAX 3D

TAKE 1: One Mans Opinion
…because film is largely subjective
by Frederick William Springer III
Star Wars: The Force Awakens in IMAX 3D
Release Date:  18 December 2015                                              Runtime:  135 Minutes              
Review Date:  23 December 2015                                               Rating:  4 (of 6
     Well, at least it wasn't The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.  But even so, Star Wars: The Force Awakens took some major missteps.  To elaborate, I'd have to jump into spoilers, so I'll hold off just a moment.
     What can be addressed first is one other issue.  Throughout the beginning, the character of Finn (John Boyega) is one big walking emoticon, looking completely ridiculous.  One almost would welcome Jar Jar Binks back in his stead.  However, it is apparent that Boyega can actually act from the other 2/3 of the film, so go figure.
     What The Force Awakens does have working for it is a good editing pace.  And 2 cool scenes where a Destroyer hangs out into the audience, if you saw it in 3D.  However, while having no basis of comparison, I don't think the IMAX 3D experience is really necessary.
     Everything else has at least a hint of SPOILERS so you've been warned.  If you want to go see the movie with a clean, untainted slate, stop reading now.
 
 
     **SPOILERS:
     While originally the screenplay was promisingly written by Lawrence Kasdan, who also penned The Empire Strikes Back (and Raiders of the Lost Ark), it was then retooled by Michael Ardnt (Toy Story 3 and Catching Fire) and Director J.J. Abrams.  The end product is an installment passing the torch, as I believe was always intended, but I think the fans, after a 30 year wait, were looking more for a continuation or, at the very least, balanced involvement of the old and the new.  Instead, you fuck with the fans by saying you're bringing back the original cast, yet Carrie Fisher has very little screentime, and that could have been easily removed, not helping progress the story forward in any way, her involvement insignificant.  Then in the teaser trailer we hear Luke's voice overlaid the length of that commercial.  Well, that was one big joke, because Mark Hamill only appears in the last 60 seconds and says nothing at all.  NOT ONE DAMN WORD.
     Harrison Ford, did have a sizeable presence.  Though, it appears they only coaxed him into returning by offering what he wanted for the character in the original trilogy.  The way they did it here was kind of dull and lame.  If you want to pull that shit off with an iconic character, maybe you should refer to the playbook used for William Shatner in Star Trek Generations or Leonard Nimoy in The Wrath of Khan.
     Over all, I think ultimately maybe J.J. shouldn't have jumped ships, trading the Enterprise for the Millennium Falcon, because what he did for Star Trek he certainly didn't do here for Star Wars.  (His greatest contribution is reigning in the CGI, opting to return to more practical effects.)  Philosophically, I get it and originally supported his decision--he grew up a fan and dreamed of taking the reins, so when someone offers you your dream, a rare thing most people never are given a shot at, you take it.  But that doesn't always translate into something good (see Rob Zombie's Halloween).
     Then there are the plot holes, the hit your forehead moments, and things that don't ring true (which number too many to touch on all of them).  Let's work backwards.  MAJOR SPOLIER if you haven't already figured it out and haven't heeded my last warning: When Chewie is first reunited with Princess Leia, he gives her a huge, emotional bear hug.  Yet, returning from the mission in which Han Solo is killed, he disembarks from the Millennium Falcon and walks right past Leia like she's a stranger, without so much as a word of condolence (or moan/grunt as the case may be), without so much as even sympathetically looking at her, though he's almost close enough to knock into her.  WHAT.  THE.  FUCK?!  Unless this is some kind of Wookie cultural thing, it is completely unbelievable and thus mishandled.  Yet when Rey (Daisy Ridley), who we've seen have no relationship with General Leia onscreen, gets off the ship, she almost makes a beeline for Leia and the two share a lingering emotional embrace.
     Speaking of Rey, how is it that she suddenly, on her own cognizance, realizes her powers as an adult and is able to control them instantly?  This goes counter to everything we've learned in the past 2 trilogies.  Even an adult Luke Skywalker had to be coaxed into discovering his abilities.  He also had to learn to handle a lightsaber, something non-Jedi, Force void Finn picks up immediately as does Rey.
     Now that we're on to Luke, there's a map to his location?  A map that was broken into several pieces and now there's a treasure hunt for the last piece and him?  Come on!
     On the same footing, Death Star 3?  Really?  REALLY?!  You couldn't come up with a new weapon?  Something original?  Then you even, almost tongue in cheek, acknowledge this goof by explaining it's not the Death Star but the "Starkiller".  If it looks like a duck and sounds like a duck, even if it is 4 times bigger, it's still a duck.  And if the Empire was pretty much demolished in Return of the Jedi, how would you keep the construction of something of that massive size hidden, especially since the Rebels that had now destroyed 2 of them would surely be vigilantly on the outlook to keep a resurgence of the Empire from forming as well as their deadliest weapon?
     The Emperor had been the evil puppeteer in the galaxy.  So who's this new unexplained super villain, Supreme Leader Snoke, and where did he come from?
     And then there's the new henchman, who's supposed to be Darth Vader incarnate. How exactly did he turn to the Dark Side?  It was shown that Anakin Skywalker began his training later in life than he ought to have and, with the power he had within himself, he had a hard time controlling it when his slave mother was slaughtered before he could save her, sending his emotions and sanity off the charts.  But Kylo Ren (Adam Driver) presumably had two loving parents and a decent home life/upbringing, we have no reason to believe otherwise knowing these characters, so what the hell could have possibly triggered him unless schizophrenia is a thing a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.
     We're also told Kylo Ren had too much Vader in him.  Again, Anakin didn't start off evil, and there was a set of extraordinary circumstances that set him off in that path, a manipulative authority figure present in his life coaxing it out of him, but no such glimpse is offered about Ben Solo other than that, after these suspicions were realized, whether this was at 2 or 12, they had Luke train him and he failed.  So he worships Vader's burnt helmet--where'd he get that?  I'm sure Luke didn't save it, if he had wanted it he wouldn't have put it on the funeral pyre to begin with--seemingly totally oblivious that Anakin redeemed himself in the end, turning his back on the Dark Side.  Also, neither Han Solo or Leia knew Anakin, just Vader, so to say Ben had too much Vader in him, Ben must have been some real twisted, bad ass mother fucker of a kid.  However, when he is sans mask, you get the impression of anything but...  (Of course, in the original trilogy, we started off knowing nothing of Vader or the Emperor's origin, and that worked well at the time.  But since we know where Kylo Ren originated from, these questions bear a lot more weight and deserve more consideration.)
     And though the events of the original trilogy only took place 30 years ago, many of the characters say they believed all the elements involved--the characters, Jedis, the Force--were all folklore and legend.  Umm, it was only 30 years ago.  I get this is a huge universe where things may not have impacted people directly, but it's hard to believe that those that populate it would think something so recent was more or less made up.  I don't think if you tell a teenager that in the 80s there were no cell phones or computers that they'd turn to you and say they thought the lack of technology was just a myth.  Or that the Berlin Wall was the stuff of legends.
     Now, maybe all this shit will all be answered down the road but what ever happened to stand-alone films in a franchise, instead of another Lost (which, by the way, you could at least get a little taste of, a little bread crumb thrown at you every week rather than a whole year and a half wait)?  You didn't have to get to Lethal Weapon 4 to understand the first Lethal Weapon or The Last Crusade to grasp Raiders of the Los Ark.  Nor did you need to see Return of the Jedi in the original trilogy to get A New Hope (though Obi-Won essentially committing suicide still doesn't make any real sense.)
 

Saturday, December 5, 2015

Hunger Games: Mocking Jay Part 2

TAKE 1: One Mans Opinion
…because film is largely subjective
by Frederick William Springer III
Hunger Games:  Mocking Jay Part 2
Release Date:  20 November 2015                                                       Runtime:  137 Minutes              
Review Date:  5 December 2015                                                           Rating:  5 (of 6)
      Quite simply, Mocking Jay Part 2 was a satisfying conclusion to the series, Philip Hoffman Seymour's demise fortunately not affecting the film, the writers and director from Part 1 safely guiding the ship to port.